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July 2003
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It's the 4BG APATHY SALE!!
By Adam - 5:18 AM, Tuesday, July 29, 2003 - 1 Comment |
The response to our last sale was so UNDERWHELMING that we've LOST ENTHUSIASM!! Everything should probably go BUT WE DON'T CARE!!
Dryers! We're so DISSPIRITED we're practically giving them away!! In fact, WE MIGHT!! WE'RE REALLY NOT SURE!!
Come in and check out our SUFFICIENT range of double beds!! We have, um, SOME!! We think.
Do we have digital cameras? POSSIBLY!!
Home theatre prices? WE MAY OR MAY NOT BE BEATEN!! Bring us a competitor's quote and we'll FEIGN INTEREST!!
Our deals on PCs are AVERAGE!! Get in quick to pick up the stunning Acer Deluxe for SOMEWHERE BETWEEN $500 AND $7,000!!
And are our printers the cheapest in town? WE DON'T KNOW!! FUCKING WORK IT OUT YOURSELF!!
HURRY!! This offer is STRICTLY LIMITED!! Sale ends WHEN WE'VE HAD ENOUGH AND GO DOWN THE PUB!! Meh.
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It's the 4BG SALE!!
By Adam - 10:30 AM, Friday, July 25, 2003 - 4 Comments
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Are you overwhelmed by CRAZY low prices? Are you bewildered by ZANY offers? Do MAD deals offend you with an insulting absence of intellect? Well, come on down to 4BG! We've got the most MEDICALLY ACCURATE sale ever!!
Dishwashers! Out they go at MENTALLY CHALLENGED prices!!
Woodheaters woodheaters woodheaters! We've got the most COGNITIVELY DUBIOUS deals in town at CLINICALLY UNSTABLE prices!!
DVDs! Three for a SUBTERRANEAN $50!! It's a DEGENERATIVE AGING CONDITION!!
Kitchens kitchens kitchens!! Our range DISPLAYS SCHIZOPHRENIC TENDENCIES!!
TVs! Out they go at a SENILE DEMENTIA affected $199!! ATTENTION DEFICIT DISORDER!!
Drop in and check out our BORDERLINE PSYCHOTIC prices on sofas! They're queuing up for a FRONTAL LOBOTOMY!!
And don't look at our BIPOLAR range of 16:9 televisions until you see our MANIC/DEPRESSIVE prices on 4:3 units!!
So get in to your nearest 4BG member and pick yourself up VIRAL MENINGITIS!! 4BG, you've done it again!!
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A very similar article...
By Michael - 6:20 PM, Monday, July 14, 2003 - 11 Comments
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As I'm flicking through Slashdot tonight I spotted something that grabbed my attention. A 3-day old article on gamespot.com titled Real Life: The Full Review. At first I thought "Hey, this looks like a laugh" and then I started noticing eerie similarities to my article from over a year ago, titled Reality: An Interview with God. After reading Greg Kasavin's article, I was convinced he had stolen my idea. I have since discussed the issue with him and would like to retract my accusation of theft. You are welcome to discuss this in this forum thread. Thanks. |
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Nintendo Announces New Console!
By Michael - 10:29 PM, Saturday, July 12, 2003 - 6 Comments
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This year at E3 it seems Nintendo slipped under the radar. Nobody even noticed or reported the announcement of their latest console! Fortunately 4BG was there to capture the action and speak with Shigeru Miyamoto about a revolution in gaming innovation. Read all about it here. |
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Uni sucks!
By Miles - 8:23 PM, Tuesday, July 8, 2003 - 5 Comments
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And you thought I was done ranting about Uni.
My results come out in a day or so, so no doubt I'll have something to say about that - but the purpose of this post is to do with future subjects. I tried to sort out my timetable for next semester so I can organise work with Uni - and guess what? All three subjects overlap at the same time for lectures. One I can change, but the other two are screwed - there's no way around it. I have to miss half the lectures of each, all the lectures of one, or somewhere in between. Either that, or pick another subject. WTF? Fucking great.
Uni rocks. |
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Make yourself sick for fun and profit!*
By Michael - 9:24 AM, Monday, July 7, 2003 - 7 Comments
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Have you ever eaten food and secretly tried to gross yourself out to the point where you can eat no more?
I tried doing just that today. I was eating a sandwich with chicken, lettuce and mayonnaise in it. I tried the whole "That's not mayonnaise, that chicken just had a cyst!" but that didn't do it for me. Then I thought about what would happen if I took a bite into the sandwich and instead of the mayonnaise being white, it was yellow, and not yellow like custard, that pussy kind of yellow, with streaks of green in it. But that didn't do it either. Then I remembered back to this time I was eating some chips which had been sitting in the cupboard for awhile; when I reached in for the last handful of broken chips, amongst the carnage was a baby catepillar, except it was so small it looked like a little white maggot, and for a moment I thought I'd been eating handfuls of maggots in with my chips. That almost put me off, but by that stage I'd pretty much finished the sandwich anyway.
Food for thought.
* Fun and profit may not be included.**
** Predictable asterisk joke may not be funny after extreme overusage. |
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Asses and Mobiles and Manties, oh my!
By Michael - 5:32 PM, Thursday, July 3, 2003 - 4 Comments
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 I stumbled across a relatively new website called Mobile Asses. With all this newfangled technology allowing us to take reasonably high quality photos with our mobile phones, it's no surprise this Hot-or-Not-esque site has sprung up, allowing the internet public to judge and categorise the finest 'asses' [sic, Adam] of men and women world-wide. Insert controversy here.
Also worth checking out if you've got a moment is Manties, Panties made just for men. See how that works? They took the words 'Man' and 'Panties', and cunningly combined them into one. The intellectual prowess exhibited in the site's witty but informative name is exercised throughout the site, making it well worth a look, a purchase, and possibly an appointment with the local psychologist. |
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Me again
By Tim - 9:38 PM, Tuesday, July 1, 2003 - 14 Comments
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Yes I know I'm thoroughly unentertaining, but it's my bloody website and I'll put whatever I bloody well please up.
Tonight I met up at the Regatta Hotel with a mate of mine, but more a mate of my brother's, Dan, who's from Melbourne. For some reason he thinks a) I have useful advice and b) This website is occasionally funny. Well I decided to put up something that'd prove him wrong on both counts.
So here it is, a guide on How To Invade New Zealand and Why. |
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