I thought I'd jump on the bandwagon and take the piss out of the whole microblogging thing. I figured I'd make up a joke website which only allowed you to enter one word. You know, poke fun at the 140 character limit of Twitter. I did a quick Google to make sure nobody else had written a similar article, and found Adocu:
Yes, it's exactly that - a Twitter ripoff that only lets you enter one word. I don't know if it's meant to be a joke or not, but I certainly find it funny. It reminds me of Gilette announcing the Fusion 5-blade razor right after The Onion wrote a joke press release from them saying the same thing.
Yes, my iPhone is going to kill me. I've started using it while on-the-go. While on-the-job. In fact, if it starts with "on-the", I'll probably have my head buried in Reader. I can safely say that I'm far less attentive to my surroundings because of this. And I wasn't very attentive to begin with.
Just yesterday I was waiting in Subway. "Who's next?" I quickly put the Jesus Phone away and start ordering. The girl in front of me (who I thought had already ordered) and the Subway chick stared at me blankly, until mid-sentence I stumbled to a halt... "You haven't ordered yet, have you? Right. Sorry about that. Looks like I jumped the gun a bit there. Go ahead." Embarrassing.
It's not going to be long until I step in front of a tram, or walk into a pole. I just wanted to say that it's been nice knowing you all.
I had a look at DJ software for the iPhone/iPod touch recently. Nothing substantial has shown up yet. So I mocked this up:
Key points:
- Overall the functionality would mimic Pioneer CDJs + DJM mixers.
- Eject button would allow the user to select a new track from their music collection, bringing up a new screen to do so.
- Knobs would be activated by the user pressing down on them and holding as they slide their finger up/down or left/right, and deactivated when the user released their finger from the screen.
- Active knobs/faders/pads would light up/glow to indicate they are selected. No other knobs on that channel would be affected if the uses finger slid over them.
- Double-tap would return knobs to their default position.
- Faders would be controlled with up/down finger movements in the same manner as knobs. Thanks to the multitouch capability of the iPhone you could adjust EQs + faders on both channels simultaneously.
- The time info display above the play/cue buttons would also serve as a nudge pad, where the user could tap + slide up/down to nudge the track. This should probably be made clearer in the UI.
- Sound output through the headphone jack would be split: Master on the left, headphones on the right. This means all output would be mono, which sucks, but it's better than nothing. The user would buy a stereo -> 2 x mono cable splitter like this:
- It might also be possible to output the headphone output via the stereo jack and master output over wifi, but if this incurred a delay it might make DJing difficult.
The only thing I can think that's missing is effects, booth monitor control and beat syncing. I'd argue that effects aren't high priority enough to take up screen real estate, beat syncing is for pussies, and the booth monitor could just be the master output signal split again. This means your booth speakers would need a hardware volume knob though.
Obviously this wouldn't be a replacement for decks, but it would be great fun for house parties - certainly more useful than a lot of the current "DJ" apps on the iPhone. My biggest concern is that the screen is simply too small to fit the number of controls on at once. What do people think?
Wifey tries to look up some Herbie info and is greeted with this:
Quote:
In the original 1968 film, The Love Bug, the original stripes differ from those in later movies; the stripes do not cover the valances or louvers of the car and the blue is a lighter shade. Also, Herbie features color-keyed running boards, while in later films the running boards are standard black. During the film, depending on the scene, the wheels change from standard VW wheels (although fitted with plain hubcaps with no VW logo) to specially widened wheels on the racing Herbies. During one scene (when Tennessee is hanging out of the window), the "53" logo on the door he's sitting on is missing. One of the modified racing Herbies featured a Porsche 356 engine, brakes and Koni shocks. All Herbies in The Love Bug had the VW badges removed from the hood and featured plain non-VW hub caps. If you examine these cars closely you will see that the hood-mounted VW logo was replaced with a plain body colored disc of the same diameter.
Fuck I hate articles like this. They go and mention that a US couple is trying to sue Google for a privacy violation because the Google van went down their driveway by mistake thinking it was a road. Let's forget about the fact the case is a joke as Google openly state you can request images to be removed and they'll take them off without incident.
Bunch of fear mongering crap. OH NOES! YOU CAN SEE PICTURES TAKEN ON THE STREET, AS IF YOU WERE WALKING THERE YOURSELF! OHHH MY GOD YOU CAN SEE NUMBER PLATES! NUMBER PLATES! JUST LIKE THE ONES YOU SEE OUT ON THE STREET EVERY DAY IN REAL LIFE!!! OMG!!! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!!!
If Google has to develop technology to blur number plates and faces in their online images, I want the fucking technology to blur number plates and faces in real life to everyone except the police. How do you like them apples, privacy nuts?
It must be tough in their shoes. They're given exciting breaking stories to report on. Sometimes there's plenty of eyewitness reports and photos to work with, but occasionally newsworthy events happen in such remote places that journalists are left to fend for themselves when it comes to finding suitable imagery to go along with the report.
Without further ado, I bring you this gem from CNN:
Australian police: Man rescues wife from crocodile
DARWIN, Australia (AP) -- Police say a man jumped on the back of a crocodile to rescue his wife, who was clenched in the 2.5-meter (eight-foot) reptile's jaws in remote Outback Australia.
Northern Territory Police spokesman David Wright said the woman suffered leg and hand injuries in the attack, which happened late Wednesday in a creek where the couple were swimming, 160 kilometers (100 miles) southwest of Darwin, Australia's most northern city.
Wright said she was treated at a nearby medical clinic before being taken to a hospital in Darwin for further treatment. He said she had at least eight teeth puncture wounds in her left thigh.
Now, what do you think they decided on as appropriate imagery? Stock photo? Fair enough. But of what? Well, let's Google crocodiles and Australia and see what comes up.
Quote:
The 'Big Boxing Crocodile' in Darwin, Australia -- one of a trend of 150 'Big Things' sculptures around Australia.
Perfect.
EDIT: They've changed the image now. Looks like I've done my bit for humanity today!
Thanks media, I'm pretty sure I've got a good grip on things now. Who wants to update her Wikipedia page and flag it as "pertaining to a current event"?
[Apologies for cross-posting -- this is also on the Games Ranch forum...but I'm angry enough to post it twice! And, let's be honest, it probably belongs here...]
Thought I'd create a thread for anyone who's had a bad experience flying lately to share/vent, as I've just had a shocker...
I flew down to Melbourne from Brisbane for the Easter long weekend. Went with VirginBlue to save c. $20 each way -- I've found them to be pretty good generally in the past. Flight down uneventful but left about 45 minutes late...not too bad these days considering it was the last flight of the day before a long weekend, I guess.
But on the way back...hmmm, I don't think I've had a worse domestic flying experience. Got to the airport about an hour and a half early for my 3pm flight (after an 'interesting' car trip to the airport, but that's another story. Hey Miles ). Checked in, no worries, got a donut and wasted some more time and then went to the departure gate to board...and the plane's not there (of course -- everything seems to run late these days). Ten minutes after the scheduled boarding time, staff announce that the flight's been cancelled due to some sort of last minute engineering problem. "No problem, these things happen, better they discovered the problem now rather than when we're in the air, they'll look after me," I think. Collected my checked bag and went to re-check-in.
Next direct flight with seats wasn't until 8:30pm -- too long, so they put me on a flight to Sydney to connect to another flight to Brisbane from there. Supposed to reach Brisbane by about 7:00pm (originally I'd have been in Brisbane at 4:30pm). "Okay, they're doing their best," I think, "no dramas, I can be patient." They give me a $6 'meal' voucher for my troubles (honestly, what can you buy in an airport for $6?). Leaving the check-in desk I notice that there were only about 20 people behind me who were scheduled to be on the cancelled flight. The cynical part of me starts to suspect they cancelled the flight because it was not full -- in which case they could have told me YESTERDAY that my flight would be changed -- but I'm not sure, so I forget about it.
The Sydney flight leaves 40 minutes late, no reason given. But I'd still have enough time to catch my transfer to Brisbane, so I don't worry about it. Arrive in Sydney and as I'm exiting the plane, I hear a call for anyone transfering to Brisbane to visit the desk at the gate. "Shit, what's happened now?" I think. I go the desk and lo and behold that connecting flight to Brisbane has been cancelled too, no reason given. Next one leaves in a further half an hour. Getting a bit pissed off now, but whatever. They give me a new boarding pass for the next flight, and my first thought is how they're going to ensure my checked bag gets re-ticketed for the new flight. They assure me it will all be fine and they'll take care of it. I should have known better...
That flight proceeds to leave about 40 minutes late, too, but at least I'm on my way home now. Arrive in Brisbane at about 8:45pm, a bit disenchanted with VirginBlue and flying in general. Go to collect my bag from the luggage carousel...and it doesn't come. Of course. Shit.
Go speak to the "Lost Luggage" lady (that poor woman...imagine it being your job to listen to pissed off passengers all day!) along with a handful of other people who all came from Melbourne like me whose bags didn't appear, and she gets me to explain what's happened. She somehow finds my lost bag 'in the system' on her computer. And she tells me it's actually on its way 'right now' to Brisbane from Sydney where it 'just missed my flight' (yeah, my arse -- clearly it wasn't on the proper flight because Virgin didn't re-ticket it when they changed my flight, but anyway...), and it'll arrive with the flight landing in 20 minutes. Do I want to wait for it? Stupidly I say yes, I'll just wait.
Well, another half hour later it turns out it wasn't on that flight. It was still waiting in Sydney to be 'processed'. It's almost 9:30pm now. I fill out a form and go home. The bag is couriered to me the next day at about midday.
Am I alone in thinking this is massively sub-par treatment for flying domestically in Australia?? That's about 8 hours from Melbourne airport to Brisbane airport -- a 2.5 hour flight away. I know this shit happens all the time in the US and Europe, but somehow I still thought our air industry in Australia wasn't too bad. It wasn't even all that busy on the day this all happened (the Tuesday after the long weekend). I have an angry letter to Richard Branson brewing in me right now...
Anyway sorry for the massive post. But I feel slightly better now; venting is healthy Please share any bad experiences you've had flying.
Carl can play the piano, sort of. He has been practising. He also does alot of walking and has named his new show 'Walking Down The Street'. The dates of his new show can be viewed on his new web site http://www.carlbarron.com/
Or Akmal's, which sounds like a promotional blurb:
Quote:
Akmal Saleh began performing stand-up comedy in 1990 under the English alias of "Peter"[6] ("Boutros" in Coptic; "Akmal" is Arabic for "perfect" and "Saleh" for "goodness"). In the early 1990s he teamed up with fellow comedians Anthony Mir and Gary Eck. The trio performed their show All Aussies are Boofta to glowing reviews at various Sydney venues. This was followed by their Bound And Gagged show. Their third show, 1996's Hoot, toured the Adelaide Fringe Festival, the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, and the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. In 1999 the trio created the television show The 50 Foot Show, which screened on the Comedy Channel in Australia. In 2001 Akmal was the voice of Jim in the popular children's television show Tracey McBean. In 2002 they wrote and performed in the film You Can't Stop The Murders.
In 2004, his Melbourne International Comedy Festival show Gullible was sold out at each performance. The show also toured the New Zealand Comedy Festival. His 2005 show Akmal Live premiered at the Sydney Cracker Comedy Festival. He has also appeared on numerous television shows, such as Rove Live, The Footy Show, The Glass House and In Siberia Tonight. Akmal Saleh also appears regularly on the Australian TV shows Thank God You're Here , The Nation, and Big Questions.
He also appeared on Spicks and Specks in October 2006. He professes to consider there to be "only one comedian in the world that [he] would pay to see, and that's deadpan American funny-man Steve Wright." [7]
In January 2007, Akmal began his radio career on Nova 937, Nova 100, and Nova 96.9 after trying out the job by filling in for Merrick and Rosso on their breakfast show while they were away on holidays. As of 2008, Akmal is currently doing the drive shift with Cal Wilson and Ed Kavalee, hosted by Jarrod Walsh, from 3pm to 6pm (originally 4pm to 6pm), replacing Bianca Dye who moved to the morning shift (9am - 12.30pm), in turn replacing Lizzy Lovette. On the 16th of July the syndication expanded to include Nova 919 in Adelaide.
On the 19th of February 2007 a lock of hair from Akmal's back was placed on ebay after some of Britney Spears' (head) hair was sold for 1.27 million dollars. His hair sold for $18,100 and was bought by a man living in England.
I love the completely random and useless information in there.
What got me thinking about this was Gallagher's and Carrot Top's pages. Check some of this stuff out...
Quote:
He headlines at the Luxor Hotel in Las Vegas, and in between does 100 or so comedy gigs around the United States. His comedy routine incorporates dozens of props stored in six big trunks on stage.
Carrot Top has appeared in numerous television programs, including a 2007 TV spot in Larry the Cable Guy's Christmas Spectacular, Tugger: The Jeep 4x4 Who Wanted to Fly in 2005, Scrubs in 2002. He has also appeared on The George Lopez Show, Howard Stern, Jimmy Kimmel, Craig Ferguson, Live with Regis & Kelly, and more. His movie roles include 1998's Chairman of The Board, and served as a spokesman and appeared in commercials for 1-800-CALL-ATT. Some may argue that his presence on national telivision in the ATT commercial marked the turning point in his career. From 1995 to 1999, he was the continuity announcer for Cartoon Network. In 2002, he recorded a commentary track for the Roger Avary film The Rules of Attraction.
Carrot Top produced and starred in an early morning show on Cartoon Network called Carrot Top's AM Mayhem from 1994-1996[3][4]
This article on theage.com.au talks of two men facing torture and assault charges for throwing an Australian tourist into a burning firepit on a Californian beach.
Two San Diego locals who don't know the victim are planning a fundraiser to support his recovery. The theme? AUSTRALIAN BARBECUE.
Personally I think it's a complete wank, and may turn on extra lights just out of spite. The amount of extra carbon they've burned promoting this event will far outweigh any benefits anyway. And as if people need more "awareness" of global warming - it's shoved down our throats each and every day, while there are far more important problems (like poverty, far worse types of pollution, wars all over the world) that we'd be better off spending our time solving (and need far more awareness building).
You know what I'm talking about. Every day at a set time, you go and buy the same thing from the same shop. Maybe it's a coffee in the morning, or sushi at lunch. You find yourself served by the same person every day. Each day the amount of familiarity between you rises. But still the same conversation takes place. "I'll have a blah." "Sure, there ya go." "Thanks." "See ya." Sometimes one of you splashes out. "Hey! How are ya today." "How was the weekend?" "Have a good weekend! Don't get up to too much trouble!" Sometimes it's hard to think of what to say. "So, still working in the shop I see!" "Been busy?" But still the same conversation takes place. Sometimes it's okay. A bit of conversation is nice. But not too much! There's other customers in line. And sometimes you just want your morning coffee without feeling like there needs to be a dialogue. It's enough to make you switch to that slightly inferior and more expensive coffee shop down the road, "just because it's easier that way", isn't it?
Time is a great teacher, but it kills all its pupils.
Quote
of the Moment:
As we were driving, we saw a sign that said "Watch for Rocks." Marta said it should read "Watch for Pretty Rocks." I told her she should write in her suggestion to the highway department, but she started saying it was a joke - just to get out of writing a simple letter! And I thought I was lazy!
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